It's still relatively early on a Salt Lake Saturday, and I'm here at the City Library getting in touch with my inner-self via this computer....So far this morning I've hung out at a food court at the local mall with another woman in the shelter who was nice enough to buy me an egg McMuffin and some orange juice. Later, we're going for a movie at the $1 movie house--known for showing 2nd/third-rate movies 2 or 3 months after they've come out at a bargain price. I think we may see "Mrs. Pettigrew" or something--(not to say that THIS movie is going to be 2nd rate)....Lately, I've been checking out videos and DVD's here to break up the boredom and monotomy and chaotic environment which inevitably happens on a daily basis at the shelter. If I'm lucky, I may get to watch it without someone carrying on a conversation about their latest fight with their boyfriend, or some other gossip at a decibel level so high it makes a Beetles concert seem like a distant murmer.
Anyway, life is o.k. for now, but it could be a lot better. I could have a place to live, and a car I like, and a job that fits me...(or one I fit into) , and a nice guy to take me out to dinner and a movie once in a while. I could have a nice group of friends that I dig being around because we all get eachother. I could be 50lbs lighter--and actually enjoy shopping because I know I'll look cute. I could have a fuller upper-lip, and straight teeth. I could be 20-something again. I could live on the beach with a family of my own and a life that would be fulfilling....
But for now, I'll have to settle for a 2nd rate movie later today, and the "chance" to job-hunt on Mon., and the "possibilty" of meeting someone, sometime, at a single's activity, or club, or as I'm walking on the beach at sunset...and "dream" of owning my own place someday where I can watch my movies when I want, with no one around to drown out the sound.
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